If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Randomize
