Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
