i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
Randomize
