these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
