New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
