You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Randomize