4 words: hood of his car
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
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