tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
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