He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
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