What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
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