At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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