I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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