yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize