STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
