apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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