That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
pray to the hookup gods
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
