Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Randomize
