Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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