I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Randomize
