By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
It's official drugs can't kill me
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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