super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
