in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
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