i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
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I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
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i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!