...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
How naked do you want me to be?
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