did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
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