Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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