This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
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