every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
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its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
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Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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