Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Randomize
