office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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