Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
