were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
