Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
