ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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