i really wish james franco would like my vagina
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Randomize
