Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
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Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
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