yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
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