Soap is not a condiment
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...