My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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