The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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