Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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