I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Randomize