Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I have aggressive nipples.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
