she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize