i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
