I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These tits shall not be calmed
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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