Pappa wants mamma naked
Moan for me like Helen Keller
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
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4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
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