i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Randomize
