We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Randomize