WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
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