Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
